The Influence of the Spirits 🌹

Who are the Good Spirits, and what makes them so good?

I speak often about The Good Spirits™️ who surround us. I speak highly of my own Good Spirits, and mention their names (with their permission) as often as possible.

Felicita, Francisco, Ava, Aurora, Giuseppe, Amalia

Mary the Blessed Mother, in her many different forms

All Good Spirits who walk with me, who have given me their blessing to speak their names to the public.

But what makes them Good? Why designate that title of Good to them in the first place?

While the terms “good” and “bad” are binary, an important discipline that I’ve learned through the practice of Espiritismo, is to be clear about who you are trying to contact in the realm of the spirits. To be clear about who’s influence you desire in your life - for the spirits certainly do influence the living, for better or for worse.

Last week I shared about mourning a version of myself who was…well…unhinged.

CW: substance abuse

My relationships to the living: my body, my family, my “friends” - were being cultivated from a series of many, many, many bad choices.

My relationship to the spirits was unhinged, too. In the midst of my substance abuse spiral, I was still pulling cards, casting spells, and talking to spirits.

But who was I talking to? What interests did they have in mind? Whose guidance was I listening to?

At that time, my Good Guides voices were faint. I could hear them sometimes, but they seemed so far away. I felt like their guidance, their promises, couldn’t possibly be for someone like me.

The voices that were loud were the ones who told me to keep drinking. Keep dancing. Keep snorting those few hard earned dollars up my nose. Do whatever you have to do to get more. You don’t need safety. You don’t need friends. We are your friends. Meth and Molly and Blow are your friends. Keep putting yourself in dangerous situations to get more. More more more more more.

To be clear, the spirits who were influencing me at the time were not entirely responsible for my behavior. I was the one with freewill. I was the one taking those actions they suggested.

It was my agency that said yes to these spirits, yes to communicating with them, yes to their ideas, their influence.

In Don Quixote, there is an infamous line:

“A qui encaxa bien el refran, dixo Sancho, de dime, con quien andas, dezirte he quien eres . . .”

Sancho said, “Tell me who you are hanging out with, and I’ll tell you who you are.”

The spirits I was hanging out with were spirits who fed of off struggle. Who delighted in chaos and pain. Who were, themselves, drowning in sorrows and were empowered by influencing the living to do the same.

The Three of Pentacles is a card that speaks to a group of people working toward a common goal. In my case, at that time, the common goal was to burn my life down and to not give af about how far the fire spread.

Why these spirits were this way is a story unique to each of them. Stories that are certainly not as simple as they were just bad spirits, just like people who are going through hard shit aren’t simply bad people.

But there is no denying that those spirits were bad for ME. They were bad for my personal growth, my spiritual growth. They were leading me to the same tragic endings that released them from their fleshy vessels. And I was willing to say yes over and over again.

I remember one night my head was spinning from all of the different substances I had put in my body. I blinked and was in a suite at the Biltmore, having no idea how I got there. In front of me was my “friend,” and a little girl in victorian era clothing. A white dress, stockings, shiny black shoes, a black now in her hair. She looked at me and told me I was going to die. I kept asking my friend if he could see her, as my consciousness faded out.

A few nights later I was on a rooftop with an ex lover, and she was there again, next to me. Staring at me. Waiting for me to leave me body and go with her. I wasn’t frightened. I was ready to give up and take her hand and go off into the night.

I remember falling asleep at my boyfriend - now husband’s - apartment. I would sometimes go there and sleep for days at a time.

In one of those long sleeps, the Blessed Mother came to me. Sweetest Mary. Mother to All. And she told me I was not forgotten. That I was not better off dead.

It took me while after that sleep to believe her. But that dream is what started my slow journey back to my altar. My journey of repentance, accountability, and self-acceptance. The path that lead me back to my roots, to my Boveda, to my Spirits Wise and Well.

The Spirits who are around me now encourage me to feel worthy of a good life. They convince me that I am worthy of love, and that my love is something worthy of sharing. They teach me to be a good mother to myself first, and to be the mother each of my children needs. They teach me to be a good partner. To be a good member of my community. They teach me to be accountable for my actions. To apologize when I’m wrong. To stand firmly in my convictions. To be soft, graceful, kind, and warm - to myself, and to others.

They sometimes disagree amongst themselves about how the road should be walked, but there is a common consensus on the path we are taking. There is a common consensus on who I am becoming.

I thank God everyday that I am alive to know this version of myself. A Person with Purpose.

These spirits of my altar are Good for Me. For that I am so thankful.

If you are ready to meet your Good Spirits, to be influenced by those spirits who desire to see you blossom and grow into the most fruitful version of you, join me for the 2023 offering of Into the Veil: Espiritismo Group Mentorship.

Registration closes on December 1st. I look forward to being in the presence of the Good Spirits with you.