Overcoming negative self-talk

If you are struggling with negative self-talk, if you are feeling frustrated and like your efforts to heal are failing, remember that it took you a lifetime to learn how to speak unkindly to yourself.

You were not born knowing how to be mean to you!

It is something that we learn over time: from parents and caregivers, from authority figures, from friendships, romantic partnerships, school, jobs.

If it takes time learn negative self-talk, then it certainly will take ✨time✨ to change the way you speak to yourself.

Offer yourself a bit of grace as you are moving through this shift.

Something that has been incredibly helpful for me as an Espiritista was asking my Good Spirits, giving them ✨permission✨ to correct my negative self-talk.

To interject and reframe the narrative whenever I am speaking unkindly to myself.

My favorite example of this was a night that I was being really hard on myself for being “too lazy” to cook dinner and wanting to order delivery (“hay comida en la casa” was playing in my brain - IYKYK).

My guía principal, Felícita, responded with “are you being lazy, or have you been caring for your two children, your household, yourself, your clients, and simply need the opportunity to rest?”

In my experience as an Espiritista, in communing with my own Spirits and the Spirits of hundreds of clients, I have learned that our Spirit Guides respect our ✨autonomy✨.

Our Guides want us to ask for the help we need rather than force the help they think we need upon us.

Striving to live a life entirely free of negative self-talk is not a fair goal for yourself. Perfection - even perfection in the desire to be kinder to ourselves - is just another fallacy of the yt supremacy.

Instead, strive to be gentle with yourself when you think self-deprecating thoughts, strive to show yourself a gesture of self-compassion when you say something unkind to yourself. 

Strive to ask your Good Spirits for help when you are struggling instead of insisting that you must go at it alone.

You are worthy of the support of Your Good Guides, and they are so eager to offer it to you.

Your Good Spirits Love You, Your Ancestors Delight in You, and I am SO Proud of you.

Xo,
Mother 🌹